Tonight has been a night of tears and asking "why did i do this to myself?" I faced a harsh realty tonight when I stepped on the scale. Yep, you guessed it. Another gain. This makes a grand total of 4 pounds in 2 weeks.
After taking to Facebook to bemoan yet another gain, someone asked me if I had measured inches. I grabbed my trusty tape measure, confident that the scale was just stupid and I had indeed lost some inches.
This is where reality slappend me in the face. Hard.
My waist is 43 inches. The healthy range is 22 to 23 inches.
I even googled how to measure your waist because I was sure I was wrong.
I measured 4 times.
It was still 43 inches.
I then decided that I needed to know what my body fat percentage was.
I wish I hadn't done that.
It is 47.2%.
I stared at that number for a few minutes as tears filled my eyes. I tried a few other websites, convinced each one was wrong.
The results where all the same.
That is where the questioning came in. How could I be so blind as to not pay attention to what I was doing to my body? How could I let myself get to this point?
I will admit, I haven't been as strict this week with going to the gym...thank you ankle. And I probably should be more mindful of what I am putting in my body. I caught myself mindlessly eating through out the last week.
This isn't acceptable. I deserve better. I want better.
No more excuses. No more "i can't"s.
It changes NOW.