I don't want to measure my food anymore. I don't want to count my calories. I don't want to have limit my consumption of all the holiday goodness. I don't want to have to forgo the Pecan Pie that I love so much. I. Just. Don't. Want. To.
I should quit. Yes, you heard me right, I should. Because that is who I
But, I won't quit. More than that, I can't. Giving up now would mean throwing away all of the hard work and dedication that I have put into this. Giving up now would mean telling Luke, sorry,but all those hours you spent with me were wasted. It would mean going back to the way I was before. Overweight. Slowly killing myself with food.
I can't quit. I owe it not only to everybody that has stood beside me and cheered me one and my family. But I owe it to me. I owe it to myself. To stick this out, no matter how tough it may be.
I think that as I have ventured further in this journey, things have gotten harder. I have had to push myself harder everytime I work with Luke, each time I step foot into the gym. I am hard on myself too. If I can't lift a certain weight or feel like I fall short of Luke's expectations, I am dissappointed in myself. I know I shouldn't be. I should celebrate being able to lift weights at all, do the crunches, do the treadmill. I should celebrate the strides that I have made.
So, yes, I want to quit. There are times I think I should quit. But, I won't quit.
"Pain is only temporary. Quitting is forever"~Lance Armstrong